I'm a little pissed this afternoon. Maybe it's the weather here in NY (it's nasty, and humid as a sarlacc in the Myanmar rain forest) but I read some more nasty comments on one of my videos on my YouTube channel, and I feel like I need a shower to clean the filth from my psyche. The strange thing is it's only one video of mine that seems to be attracting these horrid misogynistic little troll shits. While I will be the first to admit that the video in question is not my strongest interview to come out of our trip to PAX East, it was vastly improved thanks to Boyfriend's editing and tweaking, but it is definitely not my favorite interview. I know I could have done better. If someone wants to say that to me, fine. Call me out, please. Tell me that I don't look at the camera enough, or that I didn't ask better questions, or that I stumbled over my words too much. Tell me my hair needed a brush run through it, or I could have worn more make-up. Tell me to hold the mic better. But only tell me these things if you know what you are talking about. Do you have hosting or on-camera/behind the camera experience? Super! Tell me what I can do to fix my mistakes. Help me be better. That's one reason why I posted the videos I did-to get better. But don't you dare huddle behind the safe anonymity of your computer screen in your mommy's basement and dump all over me like the cowardly little sack of parasite excrement that you are. I dare you to say these things to my face. Do it. That way if you have the balls to tell me what you really think, I can then have the pleasure of boxing you in the ears and asking you if you kiss your mother with that mouth. Then I will spit on you. But that won't happen. Why? Because you are nothing. You are so much lower than nothing that you feel the need to look at those of us who believe enough in our own talents that we are trying to use our imaginations to make the world better by spreading creativity and joy to others. You peer up from your hole at us and instead of trying to rise up and be awesome too, you feel the need to try to drag us down into the bowels of the empty, self-loathing, inspiration vacuum where you dwell, feeding off of pirated garbage and misery. So, can you make a better video than I did? Fine. Go fucking do it. I fucking double-dog-dare you.
Sometimes it just boggles my mind how much hatred and vitriol there is out there. So, I've reached an impasse in my brain. A large part of me is tired of deleting these trashy comments. Should I just turn off comments altogether? Part of me is against it, because then I feel like the trolls win. I feel like they beat me, like I'm not strong enough to take their abuse. I think I would feel disappointed in myself, like I was running away because the "big kids are mean and don't like me playing on the playground with them." But, if I disable comments, then maybe I'll miss out on some compliments or constructive criticism or advice. Ah the eternal YouTube dilemma.
What would Felicia Day do..?
What would Wil Wheaton do..?
Time to watch this video again for a little pep talk.
Well, on that note, this day needs some humor. Here's some funny shit that I didn't write 'cause I'm all tapped out: